The Newcastle Diary

Peter and I travelled up to Newcastle to launch the pantomime season at the beautiful Theatre Royal. A stunning theatre with an impressive portico and an even more impressive interior, set in the heart of this thriving city.

We spent the night at the Royal Station Hotel- opened by Queen Victoria it said on the brochure. I don’t think Her Gracious Majesty had quite so many trains running under her bedroom as I did, and certainly no tannoy system announcing “The train now standing at platform ten is the…” throughout the night. Maybe she and Prince Albert had royal ear muffs?

We’d been told that the press launch was to take place in the castle, in the great hall. I’m not sure what we expected, but it really was a castle..over one hundred steep stone steps to the hall, and those medieval panto dames must have been a lot shorter than we are- standing at eight and a half feet tall in our wigs and perilous block shoes there were times we had to bend over backwards to please!

Met up with Michael Harrison- Michael has written this brand new version of “Cinderella” and will be both directing and producing it. Even the music has been specially written for the show, and it all sounds very exciting, being tailor made for Newcastle and indeed for Jill Halfpenny, our gorgeous fairy godmother.

We arrived first to do some “telly”, which we did on the ramparts, if you’ll pardon the expression, and were joined by Jill about halfway through. She arrived resplendent in shimmering white and silver, wand at the ready, and skipped effortlessly up the one hundred stone steps- not even slightly out of breath. Peter and I were still clutching the walls and gasping during the first interview!

Jill’s doing a Zola play at “Live” the theatre in Newcastle- a Herculean effort- running for six weeks, and

getting stunning notices. Dead posh that..we’re not used to working with your actual thespian what does Emile Zola at the drop of a hat! She’s also very beautiful, which means we have competition- all the cameras swivelled in her direction and cameramen went a bit weak at the knees. Peter tried the old batting the eyelash trick and showing a bit of ankle, but failed to attract so much as a box brownie at this point!

We did a “presentation” to the press and group bookers in the great hall, and had a question and answer session afterwards before everyone tucked into the cream buns. I say everyone- we declined. It’s not easy eating a cream bun in gloves- even if the Queen has it down to a fine art. Delighted to meet up with Peter Lathan, author of the pantomime book “Its Behind You” at the launch. Peter’s a local lad, and was covering the launch for the British Theatre Guide. His book is doing extremely well, and has proved to be the perfect present for panto lovers- a pantomime book isn’t just for Christmas- it’s for life!

This time we were determined that Jill would see us afterwards out of Slap and costume- so many times we’ve done a press call and people we work with arrive when we’re made up, and leave before we’ve taken it off, and consequently haven’t a clue who we are on the first day of rehearsal!

Everyone at the theatre was very friendly and jolly, and helped make the day (despite the baking heat) great fun. We swiftly packed our soggy furs and sequins, and set off for the station. This has all the hallmarks of being a great season- a sparkly new script, Jill flying about the stage being fabulous, the incredible “Slosh” scene of Clive Webb and Danny Adams, and having our mates Sean Needham and Jody Crosier with us as Prince and Dandini for the fourth year running, and having Michael weave his magic over the whole proceedings!

Seems difficult to believe it, but the rehearsal period is upon us once again- this time in the outer reaches of Lambeth in a hall that has seen better days, but hopefully not better pantomimes!

I didn’t really get to grips with how fast this week was approaching- the past month has been a blur of shows and travelling. Peter and I, along with Andrew Ryan and on occasion Marc Seymour have played Newcastle, Blackpool and Birmingham with various pantomime Roadshows- five different scripts in three weeks, and I worked out on one of our lengthy journeys we’d played at one point 28 shows in twelve days.. I got back from the Pavilions Shopping Mall late last night after four shows with just enough time to throw a few things into a bag, and fall into bed..now, here we are in Lambeth.

Arrived to find a room full of familiar and not familiar faces- a difference from the past three years when the cast has remained the same. From our previous Brian Conley panto reign we are joined once again by Sean Needham (Prince Charming) and Jody Crosier (Dandini), Jill Halfpenny (our Fairy Godmother) who we met at the press launch, Clive Webb (Baron) and Danny Adams (Buttons) who I’ve worked with once before- briefly- in Manchester, and Michael Harrison our director who Peter and I have known for several years.

The rest of the company are new to us- Lauren Hall, our petite Cinderella, who hails like Jill and Michael from Newcastle, and our dancers-with one exception- Emma Katy Adcock, who was with us last year at Plymouth, are new to us- they are Amy Burns and Amy Bruce, Jenny Dougan, Innis Robertson, Sean Hackett, Karl Williams and Ricardo Canadinhas.

The Dancers are in the expert hands of the Choreographer Jon Bowles, and our Stage Management team consists of Ray Tizzard- Company Stage Manager, who we last worked with in Wimbledon with the Rolf Harris Panto there, and Shane Thom our DSM (Deputy Stage Manager) along with Michelle Dixon and Nicholas Potts our Assistant Stage Managers.

The Musical Director for this production is Irvin Duguid- he encountered a slight problem for the first part of the day as the hall had no power in its sockets, making an electronic keyboard redundant- I also discovered the lights in the lavatories were switched off at 4pm precisely, so visiting the loo was only possible by utilising the light from your mobile ‘phone to errr.. find your way. Quaint rehearsal hall I thought….

Looking after the vast wardrobe for this show are Wendy Moreton (Supervisor) and Amy Harrison (Assistant Wardrobe). Wendy and Amy have the large blue “Qdos” wardrobe boxes installed in the room, and are able to do costume fittings during the day, saving a lot of time when we actually arrive at the Theatre Royal next Monday.

We have yet to meet the other part of the wardrobe team-Rebecca Palmer, and our Lighting Designer Ben Cracknell, who along with the juveniles from the Marron Stage School Newcastle will be at the Theatre next week.

Michael was swift to the off, and by lunchtime we were nearing a rough “blocking” of Act One. Blocking for the uninitiated is when the director tells the actors which “side” they enter from – unless of course you are the Fairy Godmother, in which case tradition has already decreed you must only enter from “The Good Side”- Stage Right! The Sisters traditionally enter from the side that has the quick change room installed- in the case of Newcastle, this is Stage left the “Bad Side”- so that is quite fitting!

Blocking also involves the director grouping the actors, and basically ensuring they try not to bump into each other as the enter and exit. All Pantomime ‘Pro’s will inevitably drift to centre stage, and to the downstage area- I think it is to get as near to the audience as possible, as pantomime is such an “intimate” art- to almost feel as if the audience is a part of the action, which, of course- they are!

Starting at 10.30- Michael had worked with Clive and Danny for an hour beforehand to go through their vast array of props, we blocked through until 6.15pm, by which time Michael had blocked all of act one, and we had gone back over it again a second time. A few of the songs were rehearsed- including the “Sisters” number which I swear might attract passing dogs and hard of hearing bats unless Peter and I can hit the right notes.. I may be Welsh, but I sometimes feel I missed out on the musicality- funny that, coming from a musical family myself- even the sewing machine was a singer…

Spent the morning blocking Act Two. At the moment the actual scripted part of Act Two looks like a few pages compared to Act One, but appearances are deceptive- that all important word “Business” or “Business to be arranged”!

Stage “Business”- rather different to “Show Business”, is an important part of any comic’s routines- often not scripted, it sits there in the script as a mystery waiting to be unfolded by the person who deciphers it- a bit like a pantomime Da Vinci code- well, a shorter Da Vinci code.. in fact, an incy wincy davinci….Well, I warned you it IS Panto time!

Clive and Danny have brought with them many mysteries, and a lot of “Business”. One comic has Business, but an established double act has a cornucopia of routines, often referred to by a single word or phrase. “We’re going to do the “Story Telling” Business here..This is the Slosh.. Here’s the Comedy Car Business..these are tried and tested routines that will not be seen in the rehearsal room, relying as they do on the many props and devices used by Clive and Danny.

It is a great joy to watch them rehearsing- in a way, our panto has three “Double Acts”- Clive and Danny- a Father and Son combination who bounce off each other effortlessly, Clive as Baron always trying to control the wayward Buttons that is Danny- not so much wayward as anarchic- and the kids will respond with joy to Danny’s naughtiness!

Our second “Double Act” you could say is Sean and Jody as Prince and servant, Dandini- having now worked together in four consecutive pantomimes, they have created the essential part of being “A Double”- Rapport- they too seem effortless and at ease. The third Double Act, the ones in the frocks, are busy trying to learn the new bits of dialogue that can trip you up when you have got used to the same script for a good many years!

The afternoon passed running through Act Two blocking again, to make certain we had all remembered it- from the Ballroom scene through to our strip- a bit of “Business” again that can’t be done in the rehearsal room- too many costumes, and far to chilly to disrobe anyway! We rehearsed “The Slipper Fitting” and, without the “Business”, the second act is quite a short piece for Michael to block- but, when it’s all put in, it will probably run for about 50 minutes.

I can remember sitting in on rehearsals for panto at the Grand Theatre Swansea as a kid, and the comics would arrive with their own particular business on the first day- often the “Business” was a well established piece of panto lore- names like “The Busy Bee”, “The Echo Gag”, and so on. The Principal comic would say “I’m going to be doing the “Truth Gag”, so if Wishee and Aladdin want to run through it in the corridor…” then they would depart, the routine would be taught by the comic to the “new Boys”, and so these routines passed on. Comics have always adapted and personalised these pieces of panto business- we have one in ours in Newcastle, “The Twelve Days of Christmas”. Although the routine may be seen in several theatres this Christmas, it will be unique to who ever performs it, as they will have added their own special magic.

Fine tuning today- Michael our director spent the greater part of the day breaking the scenes up into sections, and then rehearsing the individuals concerned, focussing on the details- this is an extremely useful way of rehearsing as you get to feel more comfortable with the moves and the dialogue the more times you do it.

In the meantime Jon the choreographer was rehearsing the dancers, and for a while we combined to set the cast into the scenes involving the eight dancers. In various places of the main hall people got together and ran through dialogue or “business”, and others joined Irvin the Musical Director to fine tune the songs. Having two rehearsal rooms is essential to do this, as well as the odd corridor to steal away to and run through dialogue.

Peter and I found a kitchen- the warmest place in the building, despite being completely empty, and ran through the script and our song several times. After doing the same script for three years it can be a bit testing to teach “Old Dogs” new tricks, but we’ll get there- the song may, however take a little longer! We’ve been given movement now- no, not dance, movement.. poor Jon must’ve wondered what he’d got himself into with us two- “You know I can’t move fast in the frock Jon? “ “You can’t move fast at the best of times” (Peter) “You want us to what? Turn.. Ohh.. err all right..after what? Where? Ohh.. sorry.. No, I will get it, don’t worry…”.. Poor soul..

Jill however sails effortlessly through dance (naturally- well, she would!) and singing, all the time brandishing her Fairy wand- a stick with what looks like a milk bottle top stuck on- funny, but all the fairies we’ve ever worked with have wanted the wand in their hands from day one- it’s a comfort thing I suppose..I wonder if Jill has read all the information on the site about how you’re supposed to cross the wand from hand to hand, passing over your heart before you cast a spell..Perhaps later, she’s got quite a lot to think about at the moment as she moves from comedy scene to transformation scene to song and to her spot in the ballroom..

Finished at around six o’clock, then the joys of rush hour for us all. I think we might attempt a first run tomorrow, or a “Stagger” as they used to say.. we’ll “Stagger” through it..but for now it’s a stagger through the crowded underground back home

Had two good full runs of the show today- Michael seems delighted, and we’re now ahead of ourselves. Obviously the “Business” has yet to be put in to the run, but that can’t be done until we’re at the Theatre Royal with all the many props- Clive and Danny will be sorting those over the week-end, and, along with the “Slosh” props, will be bringing them along on Monday.

The second run included fitting the dancers into the show, and it seems to be a very fast moving one- Peter and I have a few fast quick changes to cope with, but hopefully with the help of Wendy and her team we’ll get that sorted in the off stage Quick Change room. Clive and Danny also have a very tight change after the “Slosh”- I Imagine not so much a change as a complete sluice!

Six o’clock I started to feel MOST unwell..found myself on the crowded tube sweating and shivering, and when I got home went straight to bed- I emerged some eighteen hours later feeling mildly better- so no Friday rehearsal for me, I’m afraid. I was under two duvet shaking while Peter carried on aided by Michael our director stepping in as Ugly Sister Jordan for the rehearsal. I currently feel as if someone has my head and neck in a steel vice, but the good news is that there is no call until Monday evening in Newcastle- so an extra day to try and get over this.

Now, back to the duvet..normal transmission will continue from Newcastle next week. (Get Well Soon!!!! Ed.)

Still in the throes of ‘flu, but with the clock ticking against me, I headed for Kings Cross station and, eventually Newcastle. Was I buoyed up with the prospect of pantomime- the glitter the glamour.. ? No. I shivered on the GNER train and wistfully thought of my bed..

Went straight to the Stage Door, and dragged my bones up to the dressing room. I’d like to say it was a nice room, but I had no idea what it looked like- Peter had no option but to steam and hang all the costumes, which will eventually go into the onstage Quick Change room. The costumes, plus our wicker skips, our twenty four wigs and paraphernalia completely filled the room. Feathers poking out of corners, spotty bloomers hanging from the rafters, and somewhere in the middle of it all was Peter putting the kettle on!

Nothing works better than tea does it? Even if it is drunk in the midst of this organised chaos. Shortly afterwards we went to the top floor of the dressing room block to the “Practice Room”, and I did my first run through since Thursday afternoon. It all seemed to be retained in the memory, but not always in the right order. This run-through involved Michael and Jon putting the “Babes”- the juveniles into the show. There are, I believe ten in each group, with three “swing” juveniles – swing being the term for “stand-by”, incase of absence or illness.

Rehearsal ended around eight-thirty, then I headed for the “digs”- the flat we’ve booked for the season which thankfully is a five minute walk from the stage door. Definitely buoyed up with Nursery food- funny how one craves tomato soup and scrambled eggs when poorly..fell into bed and slept like the veritable log!

A day of getting ourselves organised. Most of the activity today was onstage, with the crew and stage management working right through putting up the set, then with Michael plotting the show. This “Plotting”, very different to “blocking” involves the director going through all the scene changes and, in some cases, lighting changes that will occur during the performance. It doesn’t involve actors, in fact they’d get in the way!

The set we are using is one Peter & I have worked with several times- a very beautiful ex London Palladium set, beautifully painted, but generally too large for most theatres. It’s the same here- the Theatre Royal has a deep stage, but it is not the widest, and adjustments have to be made to “bring it in”. This has the effect of making it look even more stunning, with all its portals and borders looking wonderful in this very historic building. One of the oldest working theatres, the Theatre Royal has a gorgeous foyer and auditorium- and a very high auditorium- the stalls, the Grand Circle, the Upper Circle and the Gallery- Michael took Jill, Danny, Peter and myself, along with Ray our CSM right up to the back of the gallery to see what the audience will see- it is like climbing Everest! The view of the stage is still excellent from “the Gods” as they are often called, but you feel yourself gripping the seat as vertigo sets in!

With all the activity on stage, Peter & I got on with last minute additions to the costumes- sorting our props, and eventually we’d cleared the make up side of the dressing room- by artfully removing our wigs and a rail of costumes to another place in the building. Several trips to the shops- Newcastle has MANY shops!- to get bits and pieces for the dressing room, and we’d done all we could by six o’clock.

All the “principals” as they say are now on the same floor, there are only eight of us in total. The dancers- healthy younger creatures that they are..are up a flight on the next floor.

Tomorrow will be a very busy day. Peter & I will be in from ten o’clock to transfer our costumes to stage level, and set the wigs out on a table within the “Quick Change”. Act one wigs on the top, Act Two on the floor beneath the table. After that we have a sound check at mid-day, a press call (costume & make-up required) at one o’clock, then the long “technical rehearsal” will begin at two o’clock.

Long technical….Famous last words! The technical side of this brand new show is gargantuan! It appears that Michael has drafted in every light, pyrotechnic, moving light and strobe, snow effects, firework effects and flame effects known to man!

Add to this Clive and Danny’s comedy car which, in itself contains more explosive devices than you’d find in an average panto..the carriage, four pristine white ponies and a truck load of props, and you have the makings of a long “tech!” Before the panto begins, the show gauze explodes into light, with moving lights panning over the audience as the overture plays. This in itself is a welcome return to that “frisson” of excitement that the audience feels as the show begins- something magical is about to happen!

The tech started with our prologue, running into “Fairyland” where our Fairy Queen is introduced- and, as befits this magic land, Jill is flown in on a giant star to join the dancers in a sea of dry ice and a set that would drain the national grid at powergen.

Technical things like flying take time- there are many safety checks that have to be carried out before you hoist your star aloft on.. err a star. Once this was sorted we moved onto the next scene- very swiftly Fairyland vanishes to be replaced by Hardup Hall—again, the set changes are rehearsed over and over again until they can be completed in the shortest time possible.

Onto the entrance of Clive and Danny as Baron and Buttons. The car (their own, as with all their props and effects) is a real car. It actually drives! The car is packed with switches and knobs that create explosions, smoke and much more, and is driven on and off by the Baron, with Buttons clinging on! It really is a wonderful entrance, and possibly the noisiest and smelliest entrance I have ever witnessed. Always nice to follow something that powerful..not!!

We tech-ed on through the opening scene, managed to get our song right which was a first, then carried on with the next scene changes and costume changes. We broke for lunch, and continued. We broke for dinner.. and continued! A very thorough technical with the chance to go back over each scene, and check out each effect until we reached the beginning of the “Transformation” scene- where the kitchen transforms into Fairyland by 10pm.

Very weary- straight to bed. Call at 10am tomorrow to continue where we left off. Did I tell you about the VERY steep rake on the stage by the way? The nearer the front you get the steeper it becomes..very wearing on the feet we discover!

Carried on from where we left off, tearing up Cinderella’s ticket, and then Peter and I set to trying to organise our Quick change area, as we knew we wouldn’t be needed on stage for several hours- the Transformation has to be tech-ed carefully, and the ponies have to become accustomed to the moving scenery, the lights and, of course the pyro’s that are set off during the scene. A fair few shovels were required in the early stages, as you might expect.. Flash! Bang.. Splatt!.. and that was just from “the Sisters!”

Our Quick change room now contains every costume and wig. We’ve worked out that there really isn’t time to visit the dressing room during the show. Unfortunately it too is on the steep rake, so everything topples over as you reach for it. Rails plummet forward and wigs, not heads will roll during the change. It’s a bit like changing quickly on board a ship at times!

Outside the Quick Change entrance is currently the full sized comedy car, a pumpkin carriage- full size, most of the scenic trucks and some ominous rows of empty buckets and wheel barrows.. awaiting the “slosh”. The Theatre Royal has only one wing- Stage Left. The Stage Right wing is only a few feet deep. During next year a major rebuild will happen, with the theatre going “dark”- i.e Closed- for a while. The seven foot thick wall on Stage Right will be removed, and the theatre extended into what was a bank next door. For now most of the scenery has to remain in the one wing.

During the day Michael and the Stage Management team ran the tech through the ballroom, and up to the “Slipper Fitting Scene” before breaking. By 7pm we had to start a full dress rehearsal, which will continue through until 10pm, and restart tomorrow from where we left off. Tomorrow afternoon is a “Preview”- a public Dress rehearsal at 2.00 with, I believe a packed house of boisterous children. Very weary actors and crew left the building, and headed for home. Still, with a show of this magnitude, you have to get it right!

A bit of a blur today- an awful lot seemed to happen in one day, and in my blurry state- the wretched cold is still hanging in there, I might mix things up! I think, as far as I can remember, we started with a Dress rehearsal at ten- we might have done a press call (not sure about that bit) and somewhere along the line I had a sandwich..or did I?

Pantomime is all about energy.As performers that is what we have to sell on stage. For a panto to work we need to crackle with as much electricity as the combined wattage of all the lights trained on us. No idea where this surge of energy came from, but by 1.30pm we’d finished a dress run, had a note session in which Michael gave some cuts- Act one is running about ten to fifteen minutes too long, and suddenly all became silence! Everyone in a dressing room quietly putting on make-up, checking the cuts, checking costumes and props. A sudden lull in all the frantic running about of the previous days. Perhaps this is when that energy begins?

Certainly by 2pm the entire cast, Stage management and crew are at heightened senses, the curtain goes up, the magical effects in the overture were greeted by screams of delight, and we were off!

Thanks to the elaborate “Tech”, the show went without a hitch. Flying cues, lighting cues and costume changes happened, and all, remember for the very first time without stopping. Amazing really! The kids in the audience were, I think suitably spell-bound, and we had an idea that we might just have a first class cracking show on our hands.

More notes from Michael after the public dress- more cuts, and some alterations. Some “Business” from Act One has now been transferred to Act two, and the running times are now One hour fifteen first half, and fifty-five minutes second half. Still a tad too long, so we’re expecting some trimming tomorrow once we’ve opened.

In between the dress and our actual opening at 7pm, the cast bustled around dressing rooms, distributing the traditional “Good Luck” cards and gifts, then we were up and running for the opening performance.

The Slosh scene is truly amazing. To see such masters of the craft like Clive and Danny, assisted by Ray our Company Stage Manager performing this routine is worth the price of admission alone. The crew were watching every second, as were the juveniles- and I shall be watching it too once I get the confidence to leave the Quick Change room instead of worrying whether I’ve time to watch when I should, in fact be changing! Fatal to get drawn in to what’s onstage then realise you follow it and you’ve not changed yet!

The show was, we felt a great success, and Michael must be very proud of what he has created. Afterwards we were all invited to a “Do” in the Upper Circle Bar, with wine and a wonderful buffet provided by the Theatre. In to see the show was Nick Thomas, the head of Qdos along with his family. This is Nick’s fifth panto opening in a week I think, and he seemed delighted at the response to the show.

Headed off to the digs tired- very tired- but secure in the knowledge that the show has finally opened, and we get to have a lie in before tomorrow’s matinee at 1pm! Hoorah!

Two shows today- 1pm and 5pm. Had some further notes to “tighten up” the running of the show, and after the matinee discovered the running times are now down to 1 hour 5minutes first act, and one hour second act more or less. The “Tightening” has affected two of our changes, so now we’ll be doing those in the Stage Left wing, aided by Amy & Beck, who pre-set everything so we can literally step off the stage, change and go back on again in about forty seconds. Act one flies past so fast for us- it’s better to be busy rather than being in a dressing room waiting around.

Found time to bond with our “boys” the ponies once again. They too have joined the car, the carriage, the slosh buckets and the scenery outside the Quick Change room on stage! Fortunately they haven’t yet left any little “presents” for us to step into outside our door, but they seem to achieve that by leaving parcels right by the stage door instead! Certainly three of “the Boys” we’ve worked with many times before- Tonka and Crystal possibly as many as eight times, and Buttons” at least twice. I have to admit I can’t remember the name of the fourth pony, but then it’s been so busy these past few days remembering my own would have been an achievement!

Both shows went very well, and we look forward to a glorious whole day off to recharge those batteries! More news on Tuesday, when we return for a full week of Twice Daily at the Theatre Royal!

“What a difference a day makes!”- Having that one precious day off really does help recharge those batteries. Still streaming with the after effects of the ‘flu, but brightened up considerably by the delivery of a beautiful bouquet of yellow roses for Peter and myself, courtesy of Jack and Ian, our friends from America- Thanks guys, the dressing room looks complete now!

Tonight is designated “press Night”, when the three or four newspapers will be in to review the show. The matinee was packed with school parties, and very boisterous they were too, then in between shows I took to my bed – I was not alone. No, I’ll rephrase that- in various dressing rooms panto folk were catching forty winks before the demands of the Press Night.

Finally remembered the name of the pony by the way- its “Buster”- not sure we’ve worked with Buster before, but the “boys” have settled in nicely. There is a terrible racket when the metal ramp is put down over the stairs.. a clattering of heavy hooves.. but it turned out to be Peter negotiating the ramp before the ponies arrived! We have no choice but to grip the walls and clatter down the ramp ourselves- well, if it’s good enough for our prized white Shetlands..!

Press night was, I think “A Triumph”, but we’ll find out for certain when the reviews are published tomorrow. Some cards arrived late, one from the lovely Rachel Spry, our previous Fairy Godmother for the past three years- Rachel is doing a second year in “Mamma Mia” in The West End- and she tells us how much she’ll miss doing Panto this year- Have a great Christmas Rachel!

Peter and I actually ventured out for a drink after the show- our first “outing” since we arrived in Newcastle- no time and no energy so far, but I’m sure we’ll make up for that soon. We did a radio interview with Jill this morning, so tomorrow will be the first day that we’ll have arrived at the theatre for the “half”- The “Half Hour Call” which, in Theatre time is actually 35 minutes before curtain up.

Got a chance to get some news from other pantomimes this evening. Our friend Andrew Ryan is directing the Lyceum Sheffield “Jack & The Beanstalk”, and they had their first technical rehearsal today- Andrew’s very busy as he is playing Dame as well as directing- Have a great Tech & Dress panto folk in Sheffield! Also got news of “The Panto Wot I Wrote & costumed”- The Kenneth More Theatre’s “Dick Whittington” which also is into Tech and Dress runs- I’ll get more news after both Sheffield and Ilford open on Thursday.

A swift drink, then back to the flat we have near the Quayside here in Newcastle- Hoping to be “connected” to the internet there by Thursday, so the diary can be uploaded more swiftly to Simon. At present I’m popping into the local library with my floppy. Not convenient!

Very busy with the packed School matinees here. Clive and Danny and Peter and I have made slight changes to the matinee performances, very subtle changes, but the Schools house respond differently to the mixed audience of the evening. The main difference for Peter and I is that the school audiences Boo a lot more! That’s not a bad thing when you get boo-ed for a living, but it can slow things down a bit! A few gags change in the matinees, and some gags work better with the mixed audience than they do with schools “en-mass”. It’s a sort of “fine Tuning” I suppose, adapting to the house .

Rose Harrison at the Theatre Royal co-ordinates the educational programme here. Peter and I, along with Andrew Ryan played our Pantomime Roadshow here to ten schools a few weeks back, and now Rose is following up with backstage tours and some drama workshops for school parties during the mornings, before the Matinee performances. Wish I’d had this when I was in school! It must be very exciting to go backstage, go onstage and then settle back and watch the show- keep up the great work, Rose!

Things have started to settle into a routine here now. Changes that seemed frantic are much easier, and you can start to notice that the ponies are starting to get into position at the same time each day- they don’t seem concerned that Peter and I are doing a very fast change in the wings right next to them- still haven’t found the time to feed them their carrot and polo mints yet, but that will be sorted very soon!

Heard from both Sheffield and Ilford pantomimes tonight- they opened this evening (Thursday) and both were a great success. Hopefully I’ll go to Sheffield on one of our Mondays off, and will have to wait until the last week of January to see the Kenneth More panto at Ilford. Best wishes to Andrew Ryan and to Nick Wilton, both giving their Dame Trott and Sarah The Cook respectively- glad you’ve opened and are a “triumph” chaps!

Outside in the “real” world the streets of Newcastle are heaving..Just getting around the city is difficult with the throngs of shoppers, and the queues in the shops snake out to the door. Our “Free” time is in the morning, and, at the moment I’m no early riser, so the morning involves attempting to get a sandwich for between shows, and the odd necessary for the digs- I found myself getting very irritable as I queued for my cheese and ham sandwich, and decided to head to the dressing room early just to escape the mayhem outside. Is it me, or is Christmas getting earlier each year? I watched a bus driver dressed as Santa having an argument with a taxi near the theatre, and wondered which world really is real! In our world all is ordered and rehearsed, calm and peaceful- yes, we do wear silly things on our heads, drench each other in foam and have the odd theatrical flash- but then isn’t that like any office Christmas party??

Two shows- again, all school children in the matinee, and mixed in the evening. The School kids really respond to Danny’s naughty Buttons, and really get into the story-line, which is comforting- with all the sophisticated gadgets and gameboys they surround themselves with, they still cheer the hero and boo the villain as their Victorian counterparts would have done. In between shows Peter & I pottered about- we’ve yet to take the “slap” off between shows and go out- I’m sure we will at some point, as we have a good two hours between shows before “the Half”, and we have got the make-up down to a fine art over the years- about seven minutes to put on, and three to get off! We’ll probably venture out when we get fed up of sandwiches every day!

If anything, the shops were even busier- apparently the sales have started? The mind boggles! Two shows as usual- no school parties though, being a Saturday, and a very responsive lot they were too.

Our dressing room has the added luxury of a “Walk in” Fridge- well, in the absence of a fridge, we have a balcony area..well, it’s actually a fire escape, but if you use your imagination it could be a balcony-fridge combined. It’s on the balcony that we keep our goodies chilled- sandwiches, milk..the odd bottle of champagne naturally.

Unfortunately Peter managed to dislodge said bottle of bubbly while taking the air, and it plummeted fifteen feet to the ground. It must be good stuff because although we waited for the crash, there was a dull thump. It has landed intact fifteen feet below us! The bad news is, we can’t get at it! So near and yet so far eh? I was tempted to dangle Peter by his ankles and providing him with a long fishing pole, but decided against it. At the moment it accompanies the deceased pigeon that decided to end its mortal coil in the basement.

Had a visit from our director Michael this evening, and he remarked at how vociferous the audience is- they seem to be having a ball! Michael will return tomorrow to watch the matinee before heading off on his rounds of the pantos- I think he’d been to Croydon and Bradford in the past few days, with Llandudno to follow.

Two shows tomorrow- 1pm and 5pm. The “Young Things” went out on the town. We settled for slippers and Horlicks. We really MUST get out more!

The highlight of Clive and Danny’s “slosh” act involves a wheel-barrow brimming to the top with foamy creamy gunge. Because of the steep rake here, the barrow is filled, wheeled into the wings- near the Quick-Change area, and “Chocked” up with a plank of wood to prevent it from leaking, and keeping it level.It stays there until it is wheeled on at the very end of their routine.

Enter one short sighted dame- me- wearing five layers of clothing ready for the “strip” routine. I have no idea HOW I did it, but..I did. Yes- I managed to kick the plank of wood as I passed by. It all seemed to happen in horrible slow motion!

The barrow tipped over- fortunately in the opposite direction to me, then a torrent of slosh began to surge downstage, covering the wings and threatening to flood under the backcloth and sweep Clive and Danny off their feet. Like magic nine of our intrepid crew appeared from nowhere, and using their cupped hands, shovels and cloths scooped up the slosh and began pouring it back into the wheel-barrow! It had to be at least three-quarters full for Clive to fall into it- and, by wringing out the very last drops Michelle and her “boys” managed it at the very last second.

I was very shame-faced! Made worse by everyone saying “don’t worry- accidents happen”..All I can say is the drinks will be on me in the pub on Tuesday for our heroic crew!

There was a follow-up. Yes- it gets worse..about an hour later I discovered the “domino effect”. You see, the stage floor here is very ancient. It is actually boards. You can see cracks of light beneath your feet. Beneath the wheel-barrow is the understage area. A cross-over to get from stage right to stage left. Little did I know it is also used as a holding bay for the Juveniles. To keep them out of the way of the slosh before they enter. Ohhhh dear.. you’ve guessed it.

Like a scene from “The Exorcist” white gunge began dropping on them, much to their surprise. While chaperones hurriedly moved the “babes” out of the way of my avalanche, the “Elex” guys- the chaps who look after stage effects, dry ice and ..well, the electrics were dashing below stage to capture and contain the gunge before it hit the electrics and blacked out central Newcastle. In the words of Brittney- “Ooops, I did it again!”

I think I’ve created a white Christmas in Newcastle Theatre Royal by accident. Sorry everyone!

Returned home after the show greeted by an explosion of fireworks over the quayside- no- nothing to do with me, honestly, as the start of the Newcastle Winter festival- very pretty it was too!

Enjoyed a day off- and the evening spent watching Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire- it was a choice between Harry and King Kong, and with King Kong at three hours and ten minutes Harry won. Perhaps Film-makers should take a leaf out of Panto directors books, and do some cutting! If we did a panto that long we’d soon be playing to thin houses!

Both shows went well today, with the customary snooze between shows- the art is to balance your cushions correctly so that it’s not possible to roll over and destroy your make-up, and mash your false eyelashes! I imagine it would be a pretty scary sight to come across a somnambulant Ugly Sister in a dark dressing room- like something out of “Tales from the Crypt” I’d imagine!

As a company, we’ve just started to think about New Year’s Eve- a lot of us will be here over the New Year, and we’ve only just had the time to think about what we’re going to do- probably left it very late to book somewhere, but we’ll make a few enquiries in the meantime. I wonder if any restaurant or venue has the room for thirty people at this late stage? Today we had the draw for the company “Secret Santa”, where you pick a name from a hat, and buy them a gift- value £5- to be opened on Boxing Day- it’s always a very badly kept secret who you’ve chosen, and this year is no exception!

Well.. I don’t feel quite so bad.. The wheel-barrow went over again today, and I was nowhere near it! Once again our valiant crew leapt into action and saved the day- however, a solution has been found, under our very noses. Stage Weights- those heavy devices that have held stage flats up for all these years turn out to be the perfect size and shape to rest the base of the wheel-barrow in, making it virtually impossible to tilt or slide even on this steeply raked stage!

I’ve noticed the rake is beginning to take its toll- Peter and I totter about in impossibly high shoes for most of the show, and as a consequence on this rake you feel as if you are being pushed forward. The nearer the front you get, the more you feel a tinge of vertigo, and the back starts to ache. I remember this back-ache from The King’s Theatre Edinburgh, but this theatre has an even steeper rake.

My boys are getting their treats now on a twice daily basis- Tonka, Buster, Buttons and Crystle get polo mints or slices of apple as soon as we come off from being vile to Cinderella and making her tear up her ticket. We do a quick change just before that scene in the wings- Beck and Amy lay out the frocks and shoes and wigs on the floor of the wing, and just as we are in them, the ponies arrive and take their positions in the spot we occupied a moment before- it made me think how backstage is run like a well oiled machine. I’m not saying anyone is well oiled.. but the whole process of scene change and costume change is like clockwork. Clive and Danny exit from the messiest slosh ever performed, and behind the brief front-cloth scene that invisible army of crew and stage management get to work.

In seconds the stage cloth full of slosh is folded and transported out of harms way. Slosh buckets and tables vanish to the wing, while a small army armed with cloths wipes away any potentially dangerous slippy slosh, another army moves in a large bed, and two large dressing tables, a giant bed head flies in, and two large flats are carried onstage by a crew with maglight torches held in their mouths while others check for stray pools of slosh. All this in an incredibly quick time. It is quite something to watch a transformation to rival Cinderella’s coach going on in our own private world the other side of the foot lights.

Tim on the crew had a birthday today, so we all celebrated in a pub nearby, So Happy Birthday Tim!

Weather quite mild here- consequently it’s quite hot backstage under the barrage of lights. Being on stage is sometimes like I imagine Victorian London to be- Lighting designers are very fond of using “Cracker” smoke machines that pump a fog onto the stage, it makes the “moving Lights” and “Gobo” effects look more impressive, but from our position it sometimes makes seeing difficult! Now Dry Ice- that is my favourite effect- that combination of dry ice pellets mixed into a device that heats it and pumps it out into a sea of cloud at low level. Our Fairyland opening uses tons of the stuff, and it really does look very beautiful, doesn’t make you cough, and evaporates in seconds!

Delighted to have a phone call from Peter Thorne, our fellow Dame. Peter is just down the road in Durham, and Peter (Robbins) and I have known Peter for over twenty years, when we first all toured in “Wind In The Willows” for nine months or so. Peter later played Dame at the Kenneth More, and has played Dame all over the land ever since. Like Dawson Chance, Peter lives in Spain, and flies over every panto season. We’ll be catching up with all the panto gossip when he visits us in a few weeks time.

I think all of us have completed our Christmas shopping, squeezed in the precious little time we have before and between the two shows a day. Tomorrow we have two earlier shows- at 1pm and at 5pm, so Christmas for all of us here at the Theatre Royal officially begins at 7.35pm tomorrow!

Well- Christmas Eve is a magical time here in Pantoland- and tonight was even more magical here at the Theatre Royal.

In this make-believe world of Fairy castles and Prince Charming meeting his Princess to be, our very own Fairy Queen has fallen under a spell..Sit back, because once upon a time..

After the second show the curtain fell, and panto folk dashed for the dressing rooms to head to wherever it is they will be spending Christmas Day. The Sisters headed for their onstage quick change room to hang up their finery, and a few of the Stage Management team and crew were in the wings about their business.

I emerged to head off the stage when I noticed Jill, our Fairy Queen had been held back on the stage, in her gold finale costume- a photo call perhaps? But wait.. there heading on stage was her boyfriend Craig- Surely he was at home now?

In one beautiful romantic moment, as he went on bended knee we realised- Craig was proposing to Jill- bearing an engagement ring! A breathless pause- Jill was taken completely by surprise.. could it be..? The answer, of course was YES!

Can you imagine a more romantic moment- on stage at the Newcastle Theatre Royal, on the finale set of “Cinderella” on Christmas Eve? That must be a first in the history of this beautiful historic building, and a memory they will both treasure.

Before I head completely into Barbara Cartland prose, can I just say on behalf of all of us here in Pantoland, Congratulations Craig and Jill!

And a VERY Merry Christmas to everyone out there in the magical world of pantomime!

I think everyone enjoyed a glorious day off yesterday, and now its back to work- these next ten days or so are the busiest for theatres all over the country, with tickets sold out well in advance.

As a rule, the Boxing Day matinee can be a bit of a let-down- audiences are often exhausted and very laid back after all the hectic preparations for Christmas day, but fortunately we had a very “perky” audience, who were definitely up for some fun.

Between shows we had our “Secret Santa” ceremony on the stage, where everyone participating gets to open the present they’ve received from their unknown benefactor. The cast member who came out best was Sprocket the dog- he belongs to Ray and Michelle, who got two presents- a chewy dog treat in one parcel and a squeaky ball. The squeaky bit lasted forty minutes until he reduced it to an inaudible hiss with his teeth. I got an almanac containing thousands of little known facts- perfect for dipping into between entrances, and it’ll set me up if I ever come face to face with Anne Robinson again!

Danny had a minor altercation with the comedy car door in the matinee, catching his sleeve in it and slamming his elbow in it, but the trouper he is, he carried on regardless- he spends a great deal of the show falling, tumbling and being very acrobatic. I personally concentrate on just standing upright on the lethal rake here!

Another mishap- Ricardo one of our dancers had problems with a capped tooth that had worked itself loose. He had family in, and was attempting different ways of securing it. “Do you think chewing gum will work?” “Bluetack?”.. He poked his head into our quick-change room during a change..”Do you think Polygrip would work? I wondered if….”

In the words of Catherine Tate “How VERY Dare you!” Bless him, he wasn’t asking if I personally had a tube of Polygrip about my person (and NO, I do not! Before you ask) but it was a very amusing moment! He then compounded the deed by saying “Oh no.. I didn’t mean.. I just thought well, it’s not worth asking anyone younger because they wouldn’t know what I was talking about!”.. How VERY dare you!! It made me chuckle throughout the matinee!

Michael our director was in this evening. Since we saw him he’s been to see Bromley, Richmond and Wimbledon as well as Darlington pantomimes, and is off to Llandudno tomorrow. He gets about doesn’t he?

Sean, Jody and Jeff came back to our flat after the second show, and we made an attempt to get through the tons of food we have left over from Christmas, but hardly made a dent in the fridge. That’s Boxing day for you!

A snowy day here in Newcastle- not enough to worry about delaying the shows for coaches to arrive, but a fair sprinkling.

I think it was between shows that I began to ponder the glamour of the theatre- “An actor’s life for me”..determined to get a nap in (which I didn’t) on the curious “Z” bed that was here when we arrived, I decided to dine between shows.. broke the ice seal around the door of our “Walk in fridge” to discover yesterday’s sandwich (Egg and something green) sitting there on the steps of the fire escape, covered in snow.

Ahh the glamour of it all- a frozen egg sarnie past the sell-by, me wrapped in an old fleecy dressing gown, well past it’s sell-by, and staring at myself in the mirror- well past the…anyway!

Michael our director regaled us with panto gossip from far and wide, and we were joined by Sean (Prince) and his partner, Lauren, who is visiting over the New Year, and by Jill. As you walk around the building you can hear the odd sneeze, wheeze and cough- Jill’s suffered for a few days, as has Jodie, and Amy, and a few of the crew. Mine has virtually cleared up, and I’m taking every vitamin supplement known to man.

The shows were packed as usual, and I made a point of watching the transformation scene from the wings- very beautiful it is too. As the coach and four ponies enter the stage is filled with snow effects from a snow machine high up in the grid. Ironic really, art imitating nature, as outside it was snowing as well- unless for economy someone just opened a roof vent and let it all in on cue?

The dancers have put up a list to see who is interested in going for a New Year’s Eve meal after the show. We’ve left it very late, but might still get in somewhere if we try to book tomorrow..

Tomorrow Peter and I have a bit of a mad dash between shows. We finish the matinee at 4.30pm then, dressed as ladies (as you do) get whisked off in a car to Newcastle BBC studios. We arrive around 5pm and go live on camera fifteen minutes later on BBC 24 the cable news channel. Although we’re facing the cameras in Newcastle, the interviewer will be in London, and we’ll be answering questions on ..what else? Pantomime- the traditions, the changes, the future. It sounds very interesting, I just hope we are!

Went back to the flat early to complete this glamorous gourmet day with a tin of Heinz Spaghetti on toast and an early night. Where are those days of wine and roses?

What a long day! The matinee was full of jolly people enjoying themselves, which always buoys you up, and it sped through. Amy and Beck from wardrobe helped us do an additional quick change when, at the end of the finale we got back into our “spotty” costumes- the ones we wear in the kitchen scene, dashed to the dressing room and re-applied the make-up, then dashed out of the door and into a waiting cab to go to the BBC in Newcastle.

Arrived in very snowy conditions and were ushered into a waiting area where we enjoyed that well known BBC hospitality- yes, a vending machine cup of coffee, then went into the studio where they had set up the camera, radio microphones and a large projection of the Theatre Royal as a background for BBC News 24.

At 5.17 precisely we went live, being interviewed on a link from London BBC. That means you hear the interviewer, but don’t actually see them. All you see is a giant picture of yourself on a monitor. We did a brief interview talking about the changes we’ve seen in pantomime, the reasons why panto has survived and finally, the importance of the role of Dame in panto. Then it was all over, as soon as it had begun!

The nice gentlemen at the BBC asked if we’d mind calling in unannounced on the Radio Newcastle studio to surprise Martin, their presenter. An opportunity to plug both the panto here and indeed this website couldn’t be missed, so we agreed. Poor Martin. Mid way through doing his traffic reports in walked these two towering visions of loveliness and plonked themselves down in his studio! To say he was taken aback would be an understatement! To be fair, he quickly regained his composure, and we did a very jolly fifteen minute interview before dashing back to the theatre in a cab.

As we neared the theatre the taxi driver looked in his mirror and said “So what’s the panto at the Royal this year then?” Deep sigh from the back seats. “It’s Cinderella”. “Oh. So what do you play then?”. Deeper sigh from back seats. “Guess” I said.. long silence from front. “Do you want the front or the stage door?”.

We slowed down near a pub. A gentleman was standing near the wall, pint glass in hand staring into space. Then he clocked the two passengers in the cab now stationary at the traffic lights. The expression on his face said it all. “I swear I’ll never touch another drop in my life…” We reached the stage door and dashed inside into the warmth!

Had fifteen minutes to wolf down a sandwich, then it was show-time again. Another very jolly show, with a very lively audience, and a good time had by all. Jill’s cold seems much better- I think Jodie’s is on the way to improving but poor Amy dancer was not a well girl, and didn’t do the second half- feeling unwell and dizzy it would be very unwise to whirl around the stage at breakneck speed. An early night and lemsip for Amy.

Had a meal after the show- a welcome change from a constant diet of things on toast and sandwiches, then through the icy streets and an early night. As I said- a long day!

The snow has melted here, thank goodness- negotiating a slippery hill then spending all day on the severely raked stage is not good for the back! Another two shows today- you can still hear a few hacking coughs backstage, but on the whole I think everyone with a cold is improving. Amy our dancer is much better, and Jill and Jodie seem much improved. Hoorah!

A slight hiatus during the second show. Standing in the wings shortly after the curtain had gone up I overheard the possibility that we might have to halt the show for a short while. It seems some fibre optic cables had worked themselves loose high up on the top of “The Star Cloth”- this is a cloth with fibre optic lights that goes behind the main “Show Gauze”.

If there is a problem like this it is the Company Stage Manager’s decision after consulting with the “Stage LX”- the resident stage electricians- as to whether we stop or not to carry out repairs. The cables themselves were not a major problem, but they might tangle with the gauze and cause a problem, or snag. Ray’s problem was that with the lighting states set up on the main lighting computer, anyone trying to repair the cables behind the show gauze would be visible to the audience. A bit distracting!

Ray decided to wait for the next scene change, when Sean and Jody sing a song infront of a front cloth, and indeed as they did the bar holding the star cloth was flown down onto the stage, the problem fixed in seconds, and it flew back up out of sight of the auditorium. Crisis averted, all done and dusted!

The dancers have managed to find somewhere to spend New Year, a restaurant very near the theatre, and I think I speak for everyone when I say how much we are all looking forward to TWO WHOLE DAYS OFF! Panto twice a day is tiring, and those two days will make such a difference to us all, especially those suffering from colds and coughs- we return on Tuesday next- 3^rd January 2006 to begin another week of twice-daily here.

Travelled back from Sheffield this morning for Newcastle. Had a great evening watching “Jack and the Beanstalk” at the Lyceum Theatre last night. Just the thing for a day off- another panto! It’s directed and written by our friend Andrew Ryan, who also plays Dame Trott- superbly I might add! Thoroughly enjoyed myself, and it was good to revisit the beautiful Lyceum once again. Peter and I did panto there a good few years ago, and have always had a great affection for the building, a very skilful blending of the original auditorium and foyers combined with modern, spacious dressing rooms at the back.

The show was great fun, starring Malandra Burrows as Jack, Thomas Craig as Fleshcreep, Sarah Thomas as the Fairy and Pete Hillier and Richard Colson and Gemma Moss, as well, of course as Andrew with his many fast costume changes, his strip and ballet routine and a wonderful pathos scene with Daisy the Cow. With the exception of Ilford’s Kenneth More Theatre, this will probably be my only panto visit this year, as so many will have finished before we do here in Newcastle.

Arrived early- always wise to choose a train that gives you a few later options incase there are delays on a matinee day! Everyone seemed rested after the luxury of two days off, although the colds and sneezes are still going around the building. Matinee went very well, with no incidents to report. During the show I got a text from Fellow Dame Bobby Crush- Bobby just finished his run at Crewe’s Lyceum last night, and is just about to get aboard a cruise liner for the Caribbean- alright for some, eh?

Between shows had a visit from another Dame- Peter Thorne. Peter’s in Durham’s Gala Theatre, and called in to say hello. It was so good to see him- we rarely meet up now he lives in Spain, and we were able to catch up over a cup of tea in the sister’s boudoir before the evening show.

Quite a few pantomimes around the country will be ending their runs this Saturday or Sunday- we still have three weeks left to play, and, so far with no sign of an empty seat in the auditorium. I have worked out I’ll get through a further thirty four apples by then, as my “Boys” have to be fed after the kitchen scene. The ponies now start to make chewing noises as I pass en route to the quick change room in anticipation of the apples. It’ll take me three weeks to try and persuade “Buster” not to grab my finger at the same time as the apple..but we’ll get there!

Dick Whittington - Kenneth More Theatre, Ilford

Daniel Wright and Isobel Hurll

This really delivers what it promises - “traditional, spectacular family pantomime” - emphasising spectacular. The great set is backdrop to Nigel Ellacott’s continual kaleidoscope of no-expense-spared, colourful, shiny, glamorous costumes with added bling. Courtesy of the theatre’s own amazing, historical treasures and Soho’s Mr Behal.

There is immediate impact as Loraine Porter’s warm hearted Ilford Fairy, with a neverending stream of EastEnders puns, is matched by Isobel Hurll’s imperious, impressively elegant, glamorously beautiful Queen Rat.

This highly visual, furiously paced show has great fun with the Queen Rat’s Squeakest Link.

Adam Gaskin is an appealing, extra fluffy Cat, Owen Smith shows comedy talent as Rat-a-Two-ee, Philip Allinson is a strong Sultan. Robert Quarry is idiotic as Bosun Bilge.

Lee Bright’s likeable, handsome hero teams nicely with Laura Medforth’s jolly Alice and both sing well. Nick Wilton’s rotund Sarah specialises in comic anarchy. Nicholas Pound’s Alderman combines good looking maturity and a gorgeous singing voice.

Busy, brilliant lighting includes a great disco number. Mark Brock’s inventive, inhouse laser light show plus an imaginatively conceived black light undersea scene advance the plot. Stuart Rush is the musical driving force. Loraine Porter’s energetic choreography even has tap dancing Beefeaters.

Mary Redman

At the Kenneth More Theatre, Ilford until the 4th February 2006

Couldn't be found to be photographed because you couldn't hear them and it was dark......only joking boys! New Camera not working!

Stu Middleton, Adrian Gummer (sound operator), Chris Winn (LX) Nathan Reynard (LX) and Ken Gorman

I’m not sure if the majority of schools go back next week in Newcastle, but so far we’ve seen full houses each show- including the very upper circle. Some theatres around the country have suffered a drop in attendances over these past few days as their schools have gone back, and parents don’t like to arrange an outing the day before a new term, and, of course school parties can be reticent about an outing as soon as they have begun the term time. Touch wood we’re fine so far!

Certainly there were a lot of ladies of a certain age in this afternoon- as far as the eye could see- it was like a specsavers convention, and you could be blinded by the double glazing in the auditorium, but they had a wonderful time- didn’t seem to mind the odd dousing with water and slosh even- game old girls out for a good time! Peter and I had a job finding “our man” in the audience, but there were one or two dotted about we discovered!

After the second show we set off for our very first “Company Meal” at “Zizi’s” restaurant in Grey Street. Thirty five of us, with meticulous pre-ordering of food to speed things along, and a great chance to unwind and socialise in a nice relaxed atmosphere- well done “Zizi’s”, you did us proud! I got the opportunity to chat to Irvin our Musical Director about Glasgow and the personalities and theatres there- he has worked there in his native land many times- Peter and I have never played in pantomime there, but have toured there with different shows in the past.

(L) Shane, Nigel, Adam, Vicky & Guest - (R) Michelle, Ray, Amy, Clive, Beck, Dan

A great evening out, and I think we all had a good time. Just what you need to break the week up I think!

(L) Nick, Sean H & guest, Lauren, Innis, Jenny, Michelle - (R) Vicky, Karl, Ricardo, Sean N, Amy, Amy, Peter, Sean H & Vicky's guest

A day of visitors- I was delighted to meet up with my former drama lecturer, Graham Davies, who I haven’t seen for over thirty years! Graham and his wife are visiting family here at Newcastle, and took the opportunity to meet up and see the show after all this time. A great start to the day.

The shows were packed out again, and in between packed away the Christmas tree and all the festive bits- Twelfth Night after all, and took that opportunity to give the dressing room a quick spring clean. Amazing the tat you accumulate during a panto run!

A bit of drama in the second show- poor Pete, who looks after the ponies along with his Mum suffered an injury. I’m afraid two of “my boys” were to blame. Apparently Tonka and Buster were heading into their truck when a passing lady unfurled her big umbrella. That spooked the ponies, and they managed to tread on Pete’s feet with considerable force. Remember- never put your brolly up when ponies are present..

With Pete out of action the lot of pony handler for the stage fell to Nick ASM. The handlers not only look after the ponies in the wings, they also lead them onto the stage, suitably attired during the transformation. Nick to the rescue. Wendy organised a rapid costume fitting, and shortly afterwards there was our Nick unexpectedly centre stage leading his team of ponies.

Despite their rather unfortunate incident I gave the boys extra rations- carrots for shock, and the usual apple, and as soon as it began Nick returned to the wings and the crisis was over!

A very special occasion tonight, as we had a visit not just from Michael our director, but from Paul Elliott, who came along bringing two theatre managers as guests- the managers of Belfast’s Opera House and Edinburgh’s King’s Theatre. It is always a delight to see Paul. He gave us our first E&B pantomime twenty four years ago, and has directed us in panto many times over those years- we did our first panto for Paul at Stevenage, and then set off on the circuit with Rolf Harris for a few years, with Les Dennis, Gary Wilmot, Ronnie Hilton, Linda Hayden, June Whitfield, Rula Lenska, Dennis Waterman, dame Hilda Brackett, Windsor Davies, through pantos with Britt (Ekland) June Brown, Stefan Dennis..back to pantos with Rolf again - on to several seasons with Brian (Conley) the list seems endless! Paul seemed extremely delighted with what he saw this evening, and was full of praise for the show and everyone in it, which is very heart-warming.

A few drinks after the show, then back to the digs. Thank goodness for Marks & Spencer and the microwave wonders it supplies!

Two shows, and a day of visitors, all of whom have a connection with this website!

Delighted to meet up with Peter Leatherby and his party, who had travelled from Glasgow to see the show. Peter has been a regular contributor to its-behind-you.com since the beginning, and has provided us with lots of information for our annual diary of pantomimes. Today was his birthday, so Many Happy Returns Peter! He owns a very extensive collection of pantomime flyers and handbills, and is an avid collector of panto paraphernalia. It was great to finally meet up and say “hello” after such a long time.

The two shows had a few hitches from my point of view- nothing earth-shattering, but minor technical hitches of a costumic nature! At the end of our strip Peter and I hold a pose, the lights black-out, and we unhook ourselves from the washing lines around our waist that are held by Amy and Beck in the wings. In theory..! My washing line got tangled around me, and in the blackout I was struggling to unleash myself and exit before Lauren’s song that happens in a tight spotlight just in front of me. By the time I got unhooked I had to leg it across the stage in the dim light while she sang on oblivious to the scampering sister behind her!

The second show had a few boobs too- literally! Let’s just say I had a problem with my matronly bosoms, and leave it at that! In short there was an unseemly scrabble in a quick change while a substitute was found!

Between shows had a chat with Andy Garton. Andy works Front of House here at the Theatre Royal , and has been in touch regarding the diary. Andy had mentioned that the diary was interesting to some of the theatre’s hosts, as it gave an insight to life behind the footlights. In the same vein I wondered if Andy would like to contribute to this diary with an insight into a day in the life of the Theatre Royal from the F.O.H (Front of House) viewpoint. He’s agreed- so we can look forward to finding out more about all the work that goes into dealing with the most important part of a theatre’s existence- its audience! Thanks Andy- look forward to reading it!

To end the day we had a visit from David McNeill, the director of the pantomime in Carlisle, at the Sands Centre. David has been a regular contributor to this site as well, and had brought his two sons along to see the show. David’s panto this year was also “Cinderella”, and at short notice he’d had to step in as Ugly Sister due to the ill health of one of his company. David presented us with two beautiful engraved “Cinderella” glass coasters- thanks David!

Finally, as we were in the pub after the show, got a chance to chat to Danny’s friend Johhny Mac, who has just finished panto at the Lyceum Crewe as Wishee Washee in “Aladdin”. Johhny was in that panto with our old mate Bobby Crush who played Widow Twankey- the same Bobby who texted at 5.45pm to say he sailed at 6pm for the Caribbean, just incase we’d forgotten! What thoughts that created as I picked my way through a Gregg’s cheese sandwich in the dressing room as the rain lashed the windows!

Earlier shows today- 1pm and 5pm. The last two shows of the week, the time when your body tells you that you are ready for the day off! This steep rake is certainly taking it’s toll on my feet and back, and the same for Peter. I sometimes look longingly at the slippers I have (yes- comfy slippers for between shows!) and wistfully wonder if I shortened every full length costume we have, would I get away with it? Could I wear slippers hidden beneath my gowns and enjoy a few moments of bliss?

Sadly ‘tis but a day dream. We need the height to be all the more larger than life as the Sisters, and, as Beryl Reid or whoever it was once said- it all starts with the shoes! Still, it’s a dream here that might just come true for the Sisters who follow us into this theatre- apparently during the close-down when the theatre extends into the building next door they may well remove the raked stage at the same time, thus making it a much more pleasant experience for Panto Dame and ballet dancer alike. Fingers crossed- we who suffer now hope you lot who follow don’t!

Had another visitor today- Lynsey Britton, our Cinderella for the previous three years! Lynsey is currently appearing in “Guys and Dolls” at the Piccadilly Theatre, London, and has been appearing in the lead during the run in her position of “cover” to Sarah Lancashire. Last year Brian Conley, this year Ewan McGregor and Nigel Harman!

Lovely to see Lynsey again- and indeed strange to see her heading “out front” to watch the show which she told us that she thoroughly enjoyed. It’s a very different show to the one she did with Jody, Sean Peter and myself, and she loved every minute of it! She’s also been to Dartford to catch up with Brian (Conley) and Dawson (Chance) recently, and had a great time watching their “Aladdin”. Sean, Jody Peter and I (the Conley Company!) went off for a Chinese meal after the show, and caught up with the news and gossip over a crispy duck!

Had a phone call from Ray Meagher (We did Darlington with Ray and Stu Francis a while back) to say goodbye, as he finishes his run as the wicked Abanazar in “Aladdin” in Bournemouth tonight. He described that last night rush as everyone does a show and packs away their belongings as people “running around like headless chooks”-and says he’ll get in touch when he gets back to “Summer Bay” and resumes his life as Alf in “Home and Away” in sunny Sydney.

A lovely moment I relished today. Before the first show Richie the Head Honcho of the stage crew was showing his daughter Amy (aged four or five I’d guess?) around the stage. She wanted to see Cinderella’s crystal slipper, as you do..

Peter was setting up stuff in the wings, dressed in his “civvies”, not yet in make-up. When she was shown the slipper Peter said to her “Now I know where the slipper is, I can steal it from Cinderella and marry the Prince”.

A Whole day off tomorrow! What bliss! To those of you who finished Panto runs over this week-end, enjoy the rest – put those feet up for a short while, I’ll be doing the same in a few weeks!

Two shows as usual- we had wondered whether the houses might be less full now that the local schools have gone back, but indeed no. The second house especially was a very “perky” one, and a very lively response. At the end of the show we stayed onstage to meet up with a local school- St. Alban’s R.C.Primary. The pupils are doing their own production of “Cinderella” in February, and quizzed us all to pick up a few pointers for their performance!

Talking to the crew today, it seems that this infamous raked stage may well remain- it looks as if the budget for refurbishing the stage area won’t run to that. I went shopping for a cheaper solution, which I found in the local “Boots” the chemist. It’s called “Party Feet”. Two curious pieces of clear squashy plastic, very similar to chicken fillets that you put inside your high heel shoes to relieve pressure on the err balls of your feet- it claimed on the packet that I could “Party all night, shop all day”.

Frankly, just walking onstage without feeling like the Little Mermaid on her first land legs would be excellent. Got to say though that they did seem to help, but have a tendancy to flop out, and you end up scrabbling on the floor looking for something akin to a giant contact lens!

Sean (Needham) hasn’t really had a day off this week- he flew to London yesterday morning for a cast meeting of “Buddy”, the musical, and flew back to Newcastle this morning. He starts rehearsing in two weeks time for a tour that will take him all over the country for the following nine months.

The backstage area is now the home of the Super Hero- or Super Villain even. Yes- despite dressing up twice a day for six weeks, the cast have decided they are having a Fancy Dress Party! It seems everyone has been raiding wardrobes, scouring charity shops and heading for the costume hire shops to become a super hero or villain. We look set to have Supergirl and Batman meeting Indiana Jones and even Popeye and Olive Oil at a venue to be announced on Thursday! Speaking as one who dresses up twenty-four times a day, six days a week, I think they’re all mad, but it has given everyone something to plan for mid week. Expect some wacky photographs after Thursday when we’ll reveal who went as who!

Visitors today- delighted to see Paul Barratt (Peter and I did pantomime at Darlington with Paul as Stage Manager) who has just finished Llandudno’s “Jack and The Beanstalk”, and Lisa Riley, starring in “Jack” and her guests at the matinee. Got a chance to chat to Paul and Lisa in the pub afterwards- Lisa has previously worked with Clive and Danny for several years in “Goldilocks”, when she played the Ring-Mistress of the Circus, which is the setting for Goldilocks of course. Had we been watching telly tonight (which we weren’t- a bit risky during a quick change!) we’d have seen Lisa in “Holby City”. I think Lisa will be seeing the show again tomorrow evening before heading for Bradford to catch up with Lesley Joseph in “Snow White” at the Alhambra.

Meryll Pacitti, Jennie Klotz, Dayna Nichols, Amy Forster, Daniel Henderson, Robin Larkin,

It takes 1 Duty Manager and 17 Theatre Hosts (glam name for usher/ettes) to keep things running Front of House during the panto season - 4 in the Stalls, 2 in the foyer kiosk, 2 on the merchandise stall in the foyer, 3 on the Grand Circle, 3 on the Upper Circle, 2 in the Gallery, and 1 in the cloakroom. When full, the theatre holds just under 1,300 people, split over the 4 floors and the 8 boxes. As Nigel & Peter have already mentioned in the diary, the Royal is quite a high theatre, and the view from the back of the Gallery isn't for the faint hearted!

35 minutes before curtain up and the Hosts are all on their respective floors, programmes in arms, meeting and greeting the public, and waiting for the announcement from the Duty Manager to come over the PA system announcing that the auditorium is now open and the audience can take their seats. The announcement comes, the doors open, and the Hosts get trampled in the rush for seats. 5 minutes before curtain up, the 3 minute call comes over the PA system. Yes, I know that's cheating, but if the stragglers think they have 3 minutes rather than 5, then tend to hurry up a little bit more :-)

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